twilight/like dandelion dust/the great happiness space

“i wonder if she’ll be showing”

“bella’s not pregnant!”

“who else gets married at 18?”

i’m from the we(s)t coast. so i really find something beauty-full in the way that rainy seattle is shot in the twilight series. i took the latest one out because the librarians at my library had already filed the other ones together. also, rue morgue gave it a not-so-bad review and i was curious. i like that edward wasn’t so sparkly this time, though my questions about the feminism in the series have only multiplied exponentially. i remember discussing porn themes with my university flatmate back in the day, and i believe we were talking about urine. it’s like the more women achieved in real life, the more outlandish the pretend ways had to be in trying to keep us down-some twisted sense of “balance”, if you will. in some ways-bella is radical-the polyamorous supernatural relationship she has sustained despite the fact that she shoulda just spent some time being single. if i was her, i would’ve felt a bit duped. her boyfriend basically made her feel like some kind of horndog because she wanted to have sex with him, and then she actually married him, and he still wouldn’t hump her. she finally chipped away at his vampiric resolve, and got pregnant right away with some speedy-developing potentially demon spawn, thus rendering her classmate’s pronouncement true. i wonder if this is the latest flip in the socialization of (hetero) gender relations. doods are claiming their right to be sensitive and chaste, and making women be the aggressor so they can reject them. the great happiness space (dir. jake clennell) is a documentary about japanese host clubs where doods sell women “a dream relationship”-the word “healing” is put out a lot. there is something to be said about imaginary partners and ideal relationships-a person could go a whole life living off of those, especially those of us with power-full imaginations. but there comes a point when you have to be ready to get out there and make some mistakes and know some people for real. the hosts profiled talk about their trust issues, partners, and crazy love. they talk about not knowing who they really are because they have to constantly pretend away the truth and convince people they hate that they actually love them. it’s interesting because they started talking about all this money that they were charging these women for this “service” and you wonder who they are and what they do. when it’s revealed that they’re call girls, the story of sex for money and selling dreams becomes more complete-ly fucked. imagine being a woman that works hard to sell her body to men and turning around to “heal” herself by joining the line of other admirers that would buy relationships with men who would do anything but have sex with them. they work more and more to get the money to pay their non-sexual “lovers”. like dandelion dust (dir. jon gunn) made me think that romanticizing our birth parents, for whatever reasons we do that is like drinking the kool-aid on the idea that there’s a “one” for us romantically. i’ve been saying that the love of your life should be the person that you’re currently with, because life goes on.

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