why black men love white women-rajen persaud

going beyond sexual politics to the heart of the matter

as i wait to watch the box score of the raptors at memphis (tell me how the grizzlies are at the top of their division and we are 14th?), it is fitting that i’m at this book, the one i picked up on my way to the heartbreaking triple overtime loss to the jazz because i forgot my book at home and needed something to read. it is actually quite an insight-full read despite its scandalous title and flashy cover to match-a cover that caused quite the kerfuffle at the gates of the acc. it did lead to some great discussion with my date and some common ground that wouldn’t be apparent on the surface.

“What can he do? Somebody boosted his Mary J. CD off the dashboard, his new Sean Jean gear ain’t saying enough for him, he is losing flavor by the minute. ‘What to do? What to do? Dreads! That’s it. Dreads! I’ll get some dreads. It works for lesbians.’ A personal cultural revolution takes place, and his appearance is now employed to redefine his solidarity. His girl loves it. It is to her what a blond wig would be for a Sister. She has finally achieved what it is she was looking for-a true Mandingo. She feels his insecurity but dares not mention it; instead, she supports his abrupt transformation while he thanks her for helping to ‘discover’ his culture and bring him back to his roots. She becomes his Columbus, and in turn he becomes her colony.” (85)

“This is where the phrase strong black woman comes from. It was generated to acknowledge that Sisters can stomach an unlimited amount of pain and suffering and still keep on. Yet, somehow, they still firmly believe that white women are pushovers in relationships.” (145)

“False power acts as junk food for the black male’s hunger. Whether it is the pit bull, the ghetto gear, social defiance, a white girlfriend, or an alternate sexual lifestyle, this false power is still one of the most sought-after achievements in order for the black man to sanely function in the white world. In short, the white woman becomes his Happy Meal in more way than one.” (162)

does your white woman go better with your brooks brothers’ suit?

“even my conditioning is conditioned”

all signs point to yes.


3 thoughts on “why black men love white women-rajen persaud

  1. his/tory:

    “If the black man senses this, he will wander, and often did, if only with his eyes. Since he is prohibited from wandering toward the white woman, he wanders where there is no consequence: his daughter, niece, sister, cousin, and sometimes even back to his mother, thereby completing the cycle begun by the oppressor. This further devalues the black woman in all areas of life and was not relegated just to slave quarters; all black women became fair game. Age was not a deterrent. Fidelity was not even a consideration. If the black woman wanted exclusivity, she was not certain she could get it. Her slave master was incorrigible, while her husband was enticed into emulating him. A legacy that is passed on to the children and their children and looped like a monotonous hip-hop groove for generations.” (20)

    “Dating a white woman will provide a similar escape and ease from discomfort for some black men. It will not eliminate discomfort, just shift it to another area that is not as burdensome. Dating white women will bring him around more whites, so rather than being a black, he begins to focus on being the only black. His conflict is not that he is black, but that he is with a white person-a stigma he is in control of, and can remedy. He cannot change his complexion but he can easily change his association. There is a newfound power because his focus is on not his race but the race he is running with. The white woman is now deflecting some of the negatives and absorbing most of the sting.” (78)

    “Thank God for sports because the racial divisions between black males and their white counterparts would be much wider. For women, it is different; they can always discuss what assholes men are.” (81)

    “Regardless of how much a person has done, and still does for the community, a white woman overshadows everything; credibility is instantly lost.” (84)

    “In the nineties, Spike Lee sent more young blacks behind the camera than Reagan and Bush sent behind bars. Yet Spike is still not celebrated.” (135)

    “His money is his life and any attempt to secure that money is a threat to his person. It is an assault on his ability to display strength, and it diminishes his capabilities to show everyone he is in control and has it going on. It is such a bizarre phenomenon that I even spotted some pit bulls in Harlem wearing expensive designer leather jackets. The black man’s resources are often exclusively devoted to financing a marketing campaign for himself.” (191)

    “A perfect example of this would be a Brother acting gay when pulled over by the cops. The officer’s fear is automatically arrested by his encounter with a sexless threat. He does not have to castrate this black man because it had already been achieved through preference.” (238)

    “These methods guarantee two things: one is the systemic elimination of black male participation in society, and the other is guaranteed free labor that is now justifiable. Not only is the competition eliminated, it now becomes a resource to be utilized. In the most barbaric way, this is the recycling of the black male.” (256)

  2. other side of the game:

    “Even today this is still in practice. Various white religious groups celebrate coming-of-age rituals by having young black strippers perform at their ceremonies. I interviewed a number of adult entertainers who told shocking stories of devout, God-fearing people soliciting sex for their young men-prices as high as five thousand dollars could be commanded.” (22)

    “Halle Berry is very beautiful, and I had the opportunity to sit a few feet away from her at the premiere of the Dorothy Dandridge story. I kept looking at the screen and then back at her, and she looked better than the screen image. A lot of Brothers have the same feelings toward Halle, but just like Lisa, she fell off when she ‘played herself out’ in /Monster’s Ball/. If I had a nickel for every one of the ‘no wonder Dave Justice left that bitch’ conversations I have had since the release of this movie, I could have bailed out Enron. If Brothers could lose interest in Halle Berry, what chance does the Sister next door have?” (46)

    “I found it interesting that both women, in two films more than a decade apart, were referred to as niggers just after their sex scenes with white men.
    For the black man, the images of Halle with Billy Bob and Lisa with Mickey creates the notion that an average white boy can get with the best of their women; even a murderous, incarcerated criminal could score a black female physician. The obvious reaction for the black male is to get /one of theirs/. These images in the media, written and visual, serve to create an extraordinary imbalance in the way people view one another as well as themselves. Media in America has had an unchecked hand in developing our social, political, emotional, and sexual perspectives. It has damaged cultures, created hate, and synthesized self-hatred. Whether conscious or not, the damage has been done and continues to be done. It’s /not/ just a movie.” (47)

    “They further contend that these brilliant players look like men. Venus Williams is not very muscular; actually, she is very skinny but toned. Serena has more muscularity, and if she looks like a man, then I’m gay. Have they looked at Lindsey Davenport? The girl looks like Bob Newhart, Jennifer Capriati looks like John Elway, and when you take off Justine Henin’s hat she looks like the banjo player from /Deliverance/. There has been no one on the tennis court more beautiful, elegant, and ladylike than Venus Williams-and she wins, while Serena has made tennis incredibly sexy and glamorous. You can Anna Kournikova all you want; she is nothing next to either of these women. The media continues to view Anna as a hot, sexy, appetizing vixen. I see John Lovitz in a dress.” (134)

    “This woman allegedly stole less than $400,000 from the welfare system, while Michael Milken and Ivan Boesky bilked billions out of the American economy. Yet it was she whom President Ronald Reagan chose to launch a personal attack against by calling her a welfare queen. She became the chief executive’s example of criminal fraud and a proverbial ghetto Martha Stewart.
    This is a ‘black women are gold diggers’ precedent if I have ever seen one. Rich white men steal billions and a poor black woman steals a few hundred thousand, and it is the black woman who is demonized and called out her name. The hustle is systemically stigmatized.” (187)

    “Walk down any street and you see black women as young as twelve years old with the world on their shoulders and a screw face. I often wondered how these young girls developed the look of a seasoned woman experiencing a divorce. The appearance of disappointment, contempt, and hostility are evident. Their antennas are up and their dispositions are braced for confrontation. When the movie /Waiting to Exhale/ came out, my fourteen-year-old niece-like many other black women-rejoiced at the mere thought of going to see the picture. ‘That’s my movie!’ she wildly exclaimed.” (195)

  3. callin’ out:

    “This movie may have served as the model for successful black men to follow, and it is this phenomenon that black women still find most unbearable. It may have its origins in other areas that have been, and will be discussed, but this film served as a textbook for its implementation. Many black men who have succeeded in various areas of life often selected a white woman who lacks pedigree as a mate. It is this /Jungle Fever/ juxtaposition that caused poet Nikki Giovanni to ask why Wesley Snipes’s character in the film could not ‘find a woman who was his equal.’” (41) on Guess Who’s Coming to Dinner

    “In the eighties, Whoopi Goldberg opened up enormous doors for a Scottish comedian named Billy Connolly-possibly the biggest talent endorsement in American comedy history. She bigged him up to the highest; I believe she even introduced his HBO special. At this time, there were plenty of talented black performers who could have used such an endorsement. Guys like J. Anthony Brown, Steve Harvey, Cedric, Bernie, the late Robin Harris, Martin Lawrence, Chris Charles, and dozens of other guys who were looking for such a break. But Whoppi traveled halfway around the world and brought back talent that the industry was already saturated with.
    There are also several ‘black’ comics who claim that they represent the black experience but have white comics writing their jokes, creating demoralizing characters and immortalizing them on-screen. Many more of your favorite black comics have their comedic voices thrown through white writers.” (123)

    “Chris was born in Bed-Stuy, Brooklyn, and was primarily raised in the seventies and eighties. During the seventies and eighties Woody Allen would be the last comedian that inner-city youths listened to. In those days, it was Richard Pryor or Eddie Murphy, and that was basically it. If someone showed up on Carson or Letterman, it was for about five minutes and he was probably too young to stay up that late anyway. It is almost like DMX saying that Roy Orbison was his major musical influence. Cable was nonexistent in most black communities, and Bed-Stuy was one of the last areas to get it.” (125)

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