bootcamp throwback-“the truth, part too”

this is an excerpt from a paper prompt featuring pictures of reconstructed food. i’m not really sure where i took this, but here goes:

….a fried potato product is the language understood across historical and geographical borders, fried dough is better-the churro, for example-woo wee. That’s the romance language of deep friend goods. Did you know that a burro is a donkey? Burro, churro, coincidence? Never. Anyways-there’s a particular shade of dog poo that results from feeding a dog reconstructed kale, chicken innards, and baked yam for every day for two years, and you gotta have the whole meal, because if not, the dog would die, like Glen-a guy I knew who would eat nothing but kale-he died. Anyway, that poo colour is what came from this diet of the dear dog that was part-daschund, part corgi-yup-the most expressive eyes and ears EVER….the designer that came up with joke of Louis Vuitton-it’s the most profitable joke ever. Let’s make these dog shit coloured bags and charge thousands of dollars for them. People won’t know what to do with themselves, so they’ll have to buy them. And you have-all of you, for years and years now. You don’t even want to see how profitable the algorithm is when I plug it in my calculations of profits vs. delusion. Enjoy your purse, and the four months that you worked to afford it-you know they call it the “Pooey Vuitton” while they dive into their vats of gold coins a la Scrooge McDuck, right? They’re laughing at you, but I’m telling you the truth, the real truth, because you seem like a nice kid.

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